HSTFUB, YASTPMO

Bad light, bad shirt, bad (ass) shorts.

I grew up in the '90s (omg my life is so boring) and the icons from my childhood range from tie-dye to bandanas, crop tops to platform shoes, girl bands to the "You go, girl" brand of feminism.

But when it comes to style, I think the '80s is totally buggin'. (Even though the '90s is responsible for that phrase -- kudos to Clueless.) I know "80's fashion rules the 2010s" is the QED of so many brands these days, from Forever 21 and H&M to Etsy and Ebay recyclings. But it's my personal favorite too, man.

What else is new, Susie Q? Well, okay, this:

I recently tried on a pair of Justin boots that had been reincarnated into a pair of shorts. That's right, I packed my stems into some belted leather shorts. (And when I say packed, I mean there was a crazy lot of zipping and belting up involved.)

Guess what? Even though they were bona fide God's gift to all BAMF-kind leather shorts, I didn't buy 'em. (Didn't suit me at all, and I just don't where I'd wear 'em.) So go get 'em, any and all nasty Houston gals. (And I'm appropriating the word nasty to mean bold and sexy, so go!) They're on the rack at Taxi Taxi on Westheimer. If you do, send me pics! Just kidding. Don't do that.

Speaking of boots, you best believe it is boot season. Just not in my part of the country yet. It may be October already, but it's still, like, 25 degrees centigrade in the shade in Houston. That doesn't mean I'm not already spending my time lusting after boots, because I totally am.

White Simones, via eBay.

Like this clinically insane pair of white lace-up Simone boots with lace cut-outs. And because I'm all hot and bothered for the fashion of the '80s, I'm gonna say they look like something Molly Ringwald's character might have worn with floral leggings in Pretty in Pink.

Via Glamourmagazine.co.uk.

 Floral leggings, check. And how's about some kinda white lace top? That would be peachy.

Via Etsy.

 With an acid-wash denim vest? Yes, please!

Via Etsy.

Y'see, designing outfits using the Internet is a useful hobby, even if you don't make any digital investments. Huzzah! That way, the next time you go thrifting or vintage shopping in the real world, you might have some ideas in mind of what to add to your wardrobe.

I'd like to end on a note that is completely unrelated to the rest of this post. Variety hour, folks! In which I name drop PB&J. Their music is super cool and at times super bad-ass, but Peter Bjorn and John own the distinction of having made some of the worst music videos I've ever seen. The video for "Lay It Down" is certainly down there in the worst-ever dumps, but while watching it I was struck by the video's setting -- that basement looks uncannily like the former Artistery in Portland, OR (it's not). Know what I mean, fellow PDX-ers?

You gotta admit, this song has a catchy hook. Whoa there, male sexual competitiveness, all of a sudden you're sounding real synthy and sexy! Thank the Swedes for that.